


364. aphelion

by piggy09



Series: The Sestre Daily Drabble Project [117]
Category: Orphan Black (TV)
Genre: Gen, Reincarnation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-25
Updated: 2016-10-25
Packaged: 2018-08-24 14:25:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8375611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/piggy09/pseuds/piggy09
Summary: n. the point in the orbit of a planet, asteroid, or comet at which it is furthest from the sun.
 “It’s me,” Sarah says weakly, stepping forward. “I’m sorry it took me so long to find you, but—”“Who are you,” says Sarah’s sister, eyes wide with fear. “I don’t know you, who are you.”





	

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [240\. damaged gods](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8367025) by [piggy09](https://archiveofourown.org/users/piggy09/pseuds/piggy09). 



> This is a continuation of yesterday's drabble.

ii.

“It’s me,” Sarah says weakly, stepping forward. “I’m sorry it took me so long to find you, but—”

“Who are you,” says Sarah’s sister, eyes wide with fear. “I don’t know you, who are you.”

ii.

She drinks coffee. Sarah’s sister doesn’t drink coffee except Sarah’s sister _does_ , because Sarah’s sister is a stranger who dumps three packets of sugar into her coffee and stirs with practiced ease. Like she’s been doing this her whole life.

“You don’t remember?” Sarah asks desperately.

“Your story makes no sense,” Sarah’s sister says, voice prim. She slurps at her coffee and she did that with tea, before, and Sarah _knows_ her, and this whole situation is monstrously unfair. _When you were seven_ , she wants to say, _you fell out of a tree and broke your leg and it healed a little funny, there’s a bump on the bone, you can feel it if you press on it_ , but maybe this woman didn’t fall out of a tree or break her leg and maybe Sarah is delusional only she _isn’t_ , and she remembers all of it perfectly. If she was delusional, she wouldn’t have remembered what breaking bone sounded like. She wouldn’t have let herself remember that.

If she was delusional, she wouldn’t have been able to travel all this way and _find her sister_ , her sister who doesn’t even know her. If she was delusional – if she—

“Let’s start over,” she says to the tabletop. “Hi. I’m Sarah. I’m your sister.”

iii.

“Hi. I’m Sarah. I’m your sister.”

iv.

“Hi. I’m Sarah. I’m your sister.”

v.

“Hi. I’m Sarah. I’m your sister.”

vi.

She wakes up in a bed she doesn’t recognize with an alarm-clock radio blaring and she is: eighteen, sleeping next to a guy she doesn’t even know. She had been talking to her sister about something she doesn’t remember now, something that felt easy, something that clicked. It always clicks, with the two of them, and she is always the only one who remembers that.

And now she’s alone. She slaps the radio with the flat of her hand to make it turn off, and next to her, her – boyfriend? – rolls over sleepily.

“Sarah,” he slurs, “come back to bed,” but she gets up. There’s a pair of pants on the floor that’s probably hers. A warm-looking sweater. She pulls them both on, and finds her wallet – her own face glaring at her, but a different last name. Always is.

“Sorry,” she says, “gotta go,” and she heads for the open door.

v.

“And I never remember?”

“Never.”

“I am sorry.”

“Don’t be. It’s fine.”

iv.

Nothing in the library is any help – it’s all psychedelic shit, _Do you feel that you’re an old soul?_ and absolutely nothing helpful and Sarah _knows_ her sister is close but she doesn’t know where and she could be anywhere and she’s alone and Sarah rips the latest book open, throws it, screams. She’s wrecking the whole library, sobbing desperately, when the cops drag her out and throw her in a holding cell.

They get her fingerprints on file. _Oh_ , Sarah thinks, and then again: _oh_.

v.

“You can’t leave,” Sarah says in the middle of the night, clutching a bottle of bourbon in her fist. “Y’hear me? I’ve been through so much – _shit_ for you, y’don’t – you can’t leave. You can’t.”

“Okay, Sarah,” her sister says, smiling in a tolerant sort of way. “I am staying right here.”

Sarah sways forward so that her forehead finds that familiar space between neck and shoulder. “’m always so alone,” she slurs. “You don’t even – know how alone you are, but I – I _always_ know, ‘n I hate it, ‘n it hurts. Don’t want it. Y’gotta stay.”

“I’m sorry,” her sister says, leaning her head so it rests on top of Sarah’s head. “I do not want to leave you. I want to stay.”

“Then stay,” Sarah says.

vi.

Like it’s that easy.

vii.

She wakes up dry-mouthed, on the couch in the living room of this shitty apartment. She rolls onto her back, catalogues. Still here. Seventh time – she drinks hot chocolate now, lives on the seventh floor, probably isn’t sleeping enough judging from the pink rings around her eyes, is still Sarah’s sister. Still doesn’t remember her. It’s fine.

There’s a scuffling from the kitchen, and Sarah rolls over onto her side. “Hey,” she croaks. “Thanks for lettin’ me crash on your couch.”

“We’re family,” says her sister, wide-eyed. She says it in the same way you would say _of course_ , like it’s obvious. Sarah wonders if she knows how long Sarah has been waiting for her to say it like that. Like it’s obvious.

She probably doesn’t know. She is never going to wake up, one morning, and know. Sarah should know better than to want that.

“I made you tea,” her sister says quietly. “With a little bit of milk. And no sugars.”

“Cheers,” Sarah says. She tells herself that doesn’t make her want to cry.

i.

They ride together in the ambulance all the way to the hospital, after that fall from the tree – Sarah screamed until they let her, because she’s not leaving her sister behind.

“It’s okay,” she says over and over, her sister’s hand clasping too tight to her own. “It’s okay! I’m here. I’m not gonna let go.”

“Don’t leave,” her sister says, wide-eyed and crying from the pain. “You can’t leave.”

“I’ll never leave you,” Sarah whispers, “promise. I promise, Helena, I’m always gonna be right here.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Please kudos + comment if you enjoyed! :)


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